Unmasking Gaslighting: Navigating and Coping with Workplace Toxicity

Not all workplaces are free from toxic behaviors or psychological manipulation that harm employees' health, productivity, and engagement, even the organization itself.

Gaslighting Defined

Gaslighting, often associated with relationships, can also happen in your career. Unfortunately, it is becoming increasingly common over the years. Whether you work in the fashion industry, a prestigious law firm, real estate, nursing, entertainment, or education, anyone in any job can find themselves in a situation where a colleague is gaslighting them.

Gaslighting typically involves an imbalance of power, with the gaslighter being someone with more authority or seniority. According to Dr. Jamie Zuckerman, this could be a boss, manager, HR personnel, board member, investor, or long-time employee. It might also happen with someone your equal, such as a colleague in your department or on your team whom you interact with frequently.

How Can You Know if You Are Being Gaslit at Work?

Dr. Noelle Santorelli explains that gaslighting behaviors can be challenging for most people to recognize because they are covert. Gaslighters purposefully employ subtle, manipulative, and gradual tactics to conceal their intentions.

Due to this, Santorelli and other experts emphasize the importance of observing and checking if your colleagues have had similar experiences to validate your suspicions.

She suggests that it might be helpful to discreetly talk about your concerns with trusted colleagues to see if they have noticed similar behaviors and to seek their support. You can also observe if others have noticed any unusual behavior if it is overt and consistent.

The Impact of Gaslighting in The Workplace

Gaslighting in professional settings can cause constant self-doubt and criticism that chip away at a person's self-esteem and confidence, affecting their ability to perform well at work.

Gaslighting increases the risk of emotional distress, leading to feelings of shame, guilt, anxiety, depression, and even symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder that often cause victims to withdraw from colleagues, friends, and family. Individuals struggle to stay focused amid the manipulation, believing they are the problem and fear not being believed by others. Overall, gaslighting leads to decreased work engagement, performance, and productivity, harming both individuals and the workplace as a whole.

Signs of Gaslighting in The Workplace

Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse that is subtler than other types of emotional abuse and creates an opposite environment to feeling psychologically safe, such as making you dread each week, affecting your personal life, and even prompting you to seek a new job. The challenging part is that gaslighting makes you question your own experiences, making it difficult to seek help.

How can you tell if you are a victim of gaslighting at work? Look out for these six signs:

1. You regularly hear negative feedback about your performance.
2. The suspected gaslighter openly speaks negatively about you in public.
3. False and harmful rumors about you circulate.
4. You start doubting your perceptions of reality at work.
5. The suspected gaslighter undermines your emotions, efforts, or viewpoints.
6. You are left out of meetings or events crucial for your job.

Addressing Gaslighting at Work

If you believe the behavior you are facing is sexual harassment or discrimination based on race, gender, religion, sexual orientation, or any other protected category, refer to your company policies and report it to human resources immediately.

Here are five steps for handling gaslighting at work:

1. Make sure it is gaslighting.
2. Document the gaslighter's behavior.
3. Seek support and prioritize self-care.
4. Have a meeting with the gaslighter.
5. Escalate the matter if necessary.